1) Firstly, it is the phrase that load partner guilt: "You again washed the dishes," "Again scattered socks", "You're always late", etc., in the same spirit. These words are pulled out as if by accident, but a bad feeling from them in the human mind is delayed for a long time. Constructive criticism such phrases are not - much easier to convince the wife did not throw socks, just ask him about it. These statements are the same nature of the punishment, their main goal - to make the recipient feel guilty. It is therefore frequently used words, generalizations are difficult to refute: "As always," "Again."
2) During the quarrels or disputes should avoid words that makes a person feel deeply ashamed. For example, "How could you do this." Thus, you would expect as a response like, "What I am a scoundrel," "I should be ashamed of yourself," "I am not worthy to communicate with this person." Believe me, these feelings should not be called in a partner because of some domestic disputes.
3) Do not use as so-called "You-messages": "You deliberately insult me," "You just think like me to leave."
4) The words that emphasize the powerlessness or helplessness partner, of course, will only aggravate the quarrel and hurt your relationship. So do not be at every opportunity to repeat "You live in my apartment", "You have to find a normal job can not", etc.
5) Avoid phrases that highlight the unwillingness to meet the needs of the partner: "I'm not going to find out relationship with you", "No more sex."
6) does not question the value and significance for you your spouse. In any case, do not drop phrases like "I'm with you I live for the sake of the children", "I'll never loved." Then you are unlikely to be able to fully convince a partner that said this is only in the hearts.
7) the ability to destroy the relationship-action phrases that denote rejection, neglect, breach: "I do not want to see you again", "I do not want to talk to you."
8) Never allow as statements degrading female or male pride: "I, too, man", "But who do you need, so ugly."
9) Do not allow yourself to words, degrading the partner family, "You're as boring as your mother", "You have some alcoholics in the family."
10) Eliminate and expressions that can diminish the nationality or place of birth of the husband or wife.