How not to spoil relations with his mother

How not to spoil relations with his mother
 Classic triangle - a man and two women. Relationships are compounded by the fact that one of the women - mother of men. Many say that the main problem - jealousy mother to beloved son. But it turns out, it is not always jealousy ...

Mom was always the life of your men. She knows a lot about him - even such that seemingly known only to you. My mother was very kind to the daily activities of his son, and he is always ready to answer her questions about how he slept, ate, why put on the jacket, etc. It turns out that you are not only necessary for him a woman, once he had long talks with my mother? No wonder they say that jealousy often arises not from the first-in-law, and from the daughter.

However, imagine yourself in the place of his mother. Son is born, grows, goes to kindergarten and school, goes to school, gets a job, and then meets a girl. Falls in love with her. And now it was she, not a mother - his half, his dream, his love. Son changed. Unusual smells different way of communicating, new interests ... Son introduces you with his chosen, not expecting from you advice about this. He became an independent, truly grown up! He just put my mother in front of the fact that he now has another life. And if a woman (in fact, for my mother, she - an outsider, a stranger and is initially hostile people) now lives in an apartment with you? Difficult to remake themselves, to adapt to changing conditions. No wonder people say: "Look mother raised for someone, and his son - for themselves."

Try to understand the mother of her husband, she did not declare war immediately. Perhaps this woman even become your advocate. Keep in mind that the older generation is vital to feel significant, important, "not quite decrepit," helping children and grandchildren, even against their will. Other interests of the parents may not be so mom ready to sacrifice everything for the sake of his son. Child "separated", and then life loses its meaning mother. So she tries to keep at least some influence.

The best option - to find the mother of his men hobby. This can be online forums with the same interests, creative studio or travel. At the same time, try to live apart from his mother. You have different rhythms of everyday life, you will feel the eternal guest, and in general - living together with parents prevent intimate love relationship. But if you still have to live under the same roof - suffering and respect his mother. Keep your distance: everyone should have a private space, which go beyond the boundaries should not be. Force yourself to love it is not necessary, it is psychologically difficult, and the mother of your man does not appreciate such feelings. It is unlikely that it will start to treat you like a daughter. Do not attempt to depict the child communicate with his mother on an equal footing. At the same time try not to discuss it with her son, do not complain - they say, your Sasha yesterday was drinking beer with friends, it's so educated that it is more important than all the other friends! In contrast, the mother of your men must understand that, despite the shortcomings of her son, you love him with all my heart. If she feels your gratitude for her gift - his son, then begins to be proud of their generosity and will be treated to you a warm and welcoming. However, if your chosen mother believes that you have taken away from her son, she would never be able to overcome the resentment.

The main feeling that you should feel the - is gratitude. It was her mom wants you to do your favorite.

Tags: child, mother, men, relationships, parent, love, mother in law