All the glory goes to those who surpassed the enemy, he had resisted and defeated. Do not fall in battle - honorable. And losing, say, "I did everything I could, but he was stronger." And since the position of defending often always weaker, then aggression is encouraged. All of these cultural traditions of European culture are used in all spheres of life: and the work on the road, in the family. If you want to win this fight aggressive force, you have to build muscle and armor, to be able to reflect the impacts and apply them first.
But there is another path - the path of Aikido. There are no victories and defeats. There are only thoughts about self-improvement and own way.
Aikido teaches us not to contest and compared themselves with others, but only to himself, finding himself better. In Aikido taught to win and not to pacify the aggressor and aggression. If you were attacked, you can run or answer. In the first case, you are a coward, in the second - you yourself become the aggressor, has also adopted other people's rules. In Aikido you do not give rebuff, you let the attacker to fly through you, as through the air, without encountering resistance.
If you try to apply philosophy to life conflicts, then it will look something like this. If you cry, do not cry in response. The best thing - it will all meet in a whisper. To listen you captive, and the intensity decreases necessarily scream, because too stupid to shout to the person who answers barely audible. So you will be able not only to begin to extinguish the manifestation of the conflict, but not to give the opponent an aggressive scenario, offering his own.
If your opponent is too excited and say, "Maybe I should leave you to calm down. Then we will talk and discuss everything. " Sometimes this phrase helps the aggressor and calms down a bit to still talk to you. If he continues to cry out - leave. Do it quietly without slamming doors, and if you can, try to do it with a smile and friendly.
Do not make excuses - it means just weakly reflects the impact.
Ask a question, not related to the topic of conversation. This will force your opponent if you do not change the subject, the more confused and slow down. If some of the criticisms are valid, peacefully settle. Agreed to gradually repay the conflict. Resistance support its glow.
Remember: you can break through the stone wall, but you can not break the air or water. Be really peaceful and calm in the conflict. And if at the moment it can not be solved by simply walk away. Then, when your opponent reprimand, nakrichit and calm down, it will not be re equally incendiary, and you will have the opportunity to discuss everything quietly.