Divorce: Who is to blame and what to do?

 If the word "divorce" was made only in the family, but in fact the event has not yet occurred, you should consider the situation and take measures to preserve the family. Building relationships is only possible if both sides recognize their mistakes. If divorce is inevitable and there is no chance to save a marriage, it is better to let go of the situation, not to be humiliated and do not lose their human dignity, and to give his wife, reshivshemusya breaking relations to deal with the process of divorce.

In a situation of divorce or other family conflict, there are two important settings of the spouses in relation to each other: protective and informative. The first is to attempt to withdraw into himself and defend against the pain, which can lead to charges of spouse and to deny their guilt. The second - the desire to understand the husband or wife who decided to divorce, to recognize its share of responsibility and to take affirmative action to overcome the consequences of divorce. The second unit is the most productive, and the first can lead to the fact that people have not realized his role in the incident, will take part of their disruptive behavior in the following respects.

Very often, at the time of divorce, a man opens his eyes. He begins to realize that he did many things wrong, mistakes were made that led to such a sad end. And man embracing a deep depression due to the fact that you can not go back and fix everything. The main thing at this point is not to take the blame and not to engage in self-abasement. Need to admit their mistakes, but to take on the 100% responsibility for the incident divorce is not worth it.

In order to survive the divorce, it is important to let go of resentment and stop feeling sorry for myself. The position of the victim in itself destructive. She does not live in the present, can not build a new relationship. You must accept the fact that life started a new band.

If after a divorce meeting with former spouse gives pain or give false hope for his return, it is better to abandon all contact with him up to change the mobile phone number and stop viewing his photos in social networks. Of course, after the divorce, it is not necessary to demand from him the impossible - to forget the man and erase from memory all the years lived together. While there is to do something useful, to determine for themselves the task for the near future (travel, career, family holiday, participation in charitable organizations, repair, etc.). Gradually, everything will fall into place. The main thing is to forgive and let go of the person and move on.