It is not necessary to mentally play over and over again what else negative points. By constant repetition will only get worse. In addition, it makes it difficult to move forward. You need to do something important, for example, to make a presentation? Perhaps before you failed. Or you do it the first time? In any case, you must bow to the "here and now", that is to focus solely on what you are doing at the moment. Keep close discomfort. Do not think about who would think and how you look from the side.
Disadvantages can be turned into advantages. Self-esteem is often reduced due to reflection ("Why am I so worried about?", "What is meant by this man, turning to me?", Etc.). However, this self-examination is useful to send a few different direction - better creative. Personal emotions can be expressed in poetry and paintings. In principle, modesty and do not interfere with the success of soul-searching, if they do not obey all the spheres of life.
You can not suppress the natural reactions. You embarrassed and blushing? It's okay. You are what you eat. Do not take the natural reaction - so injure the psyche. Shy, once in a stressful situation - this is normal. Realizing this, you will increase your self-esteem.
We must learn to keep any impact, even if it's just a rejection of the meeting tonight. If you said "no", it does not mean that you are boring and uninteresting. You never know what the problem may be with your buddy? It's not about you. The next time you should try again.
And the most important thing. After the failure should not be killed. Yearn for a bit, draw conclusions and "release" an unpleasant situation that's more to her return. And yet - try to make a joke on this topic, because the self-irony helps to combat complexes.